If you’re a caregiver for an older adult, you may have noticed that at times, it’s difficult to connect with your loved one. Maybe they seem depressed and withdrawn, or maybe you’re stuck in a rut with the same routine. Or, dementia may be making communication difficult. How can you engage the older adult in your life, and find meaningful activities to share as a caregiver?
In a joint survey conducted by Humana and the National Council on Aging, 90% of older adults reported that they feel “revitalized” when they spend time with their families. 1 This positive effect on well-being is something you can offer to the older adult you provide care for. There are a few ways to make this easier. Let’s take a closer look.
1. Consider any limitations
It can be easy to see things from only our own perspective. As a caregiver, you might not even be aware of all the limitations your loved one faces. These limitations can prevent them from enjoying activities, or sometimes from even joining them:
- Mobility
- Vision
- Hearing
- Cognitive challenges
Are there activities you know the older adult in your life would like to do, but they seem to avoid them? Are there activities you have suggested but they don’t seem interested? Consider if any limitations could be behind the reluctance.
Maybe there is a similar option that doesn’t involve those limitations; for example, inviting a good friend over for a card game, instead of going to visit. You can even offer to pick up and drive the friend to your loved one’s home.
2. Remove barriers where possible
This brings us to another way to help engage an older adult: removing barriers. By finding ways to make activities accessible despite limitations, a whole new world can open up. Some examples:
- Be an advocate- by joining your loved one at routine doctor’s visits, you can learn more about what kinds of health concerns and limitations they have. This is also an opportunity to ask the doctor if there are ways to help with mobility and other tasks, like a referral to an occupational therapist (OT) or physical therapist (PT) who can help you with ideas to make activities more accessible.
- Improve vision challenges- large print versions of crosswords, books, games, and more can help someone with vision trouble join in more easily. Could a magnifying glass help, or an e-reader that can magnify print? Better yet, offer to read their favorite materials to them. And audiobooks offer an option to share a book aloud together while doing another hands-on task, like a craft.
- Remove physical barriers- a seated walker can allow for rest breaks more easily; a wheelchair can mean the difference between being able to get outdoors for a walk in the fresh air, or being stuck in the house. Teaching older adults to use a simple tablet for video calls can let them stay connected virtually with important people in their lives.
- Offer smaller, simpler versions of larger activities- maybe the person used to love gardening but can’t bend and walk as easily anymore; try container gardening on the porch, or arrange comfortable seating and let them work to pot small plants rather than a whole flowerbed. Or maybe they enjoyed cooking elaborate dishes- aim for simpler recipes, and work together on the tasks involved to prep and bake. Maybe they can help you find a new recipe to try each week!
- Bring entertainment into the home- going out to the movies might be too much, but playing a new release on a big-screen TV, making popcorn, and inviting over friends or family can make it an event at home. Recorded concerts can bring well-loved music to life. What about a comedy night at home?
3. Remember to ask for their input
All of the above ideas are great ways to engage an older adult in your care, but perhaps the most important part of it all is collaboration. What are their ideas? What do they like to do most, or miss the most?
You can get a lot more buy-in when it comes to activities by asking questions and including a person in figuring out the best solutions to be a part of things. What stories can they tell you about their life and favorite memories? Sometimes just listening can give you clues about good activity choices.
4. Encourage companionship to engage an older adult
Loneliness can have major negative consequences for older adults. As limitations in mobility and health problems interfere with getting out of the house, it can be easy for older adults to become isolated. And as one study reported, older adults who identified themselves as lonely had a 45% higher risk of death and a 59% higher risk of health decline. 2
Encouraging companionship for an older adult in your care should be a top priority. Some of the activities that create connections with other people can help your loved one stay more mentally active, too:
- Help them learn something new- maybe they’d like to be able to play a game online with a friend but don’t understand the app. Or there’s a class they’d go to if they could drive- could you take it together?
- Adopt a pet- this isn’t for everyone, but if you’re able to help them care for a pet, you can both enjoy sharing the fun a pet brings, and they can form a bond with an animal friend that is with them 24/7.
- Ask them to teach you a skill you don’t have- maybe you can’t crochet but would like to learn. Interested in gardening but don’t know where to start? Need cooking tips? Older adults have a wealth of experience and often enjoy sharing it and feeling valuable.
- Play a game together- nothing beats game night! Card games, putting together puzzles, board games, and more are all great activities for spending time with an older adult.
- Go for a walk together- not only does this encourage physical exercise, it’s also a great time to have a quiet conversation.
Caregiving is a team effort
No matter which approach you take to engage the older adult in your care, remember that caregiving doesn’t have to fall on one person. If you are a primary caregiver at risk for caregiver burnout, there may be other resources you can lean on. Are there other family members who enjoy gardening more than you do? Maybe they can join once a month. Reading books isn’t your thing? Can another person drop by to read for a while?
Another option to help you keep the older adult in your life engaged and happy is to involve a professional in-home caregiver. Whether it’s for temporary respite care or regular help with daily tasks, a paid caregiver can build a relationship with the person in their care and pick up with activities wherever family caregivers leave off.
If you’re ready to add in-home care to your toolkit of ways to support your loved one, Caresify’s experienced caregivers can provide person-centered care that gives you the peace of mind of knowing your loved one is safe and happy when you can’t be there. For more details, visit our homepage or call 888-799-5007.
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